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I don't know about you but I had 2 similar partners over 12 years who I finally worked out were similar and bad news for me. Why were these 2 beautiful ladies drawn, or why did I choose them.
When someone new comes in the scene it is only natural to check they are not like other not good for you partners, but if you are not careful by expecting them to be, you can almost make them it. The moral of the story then, open your eyes, but park your relationship junk, don't use it as a filter to gauge your next partner, give them a chance to show who they really are and give yourself a chance to meet and keep someone great. That's my goal for 2009.

To the ladies,
Being wonderfully blessed in this dpt, I wonder whether size does matter to you. Do you like tall men, short or medium size. Does it matter. Fat, thin, what turns you on, what doesn't?
What did you think I meant..surely not..size in..lunchbox dimensions! I wouldn't dare ask such a personal question but while we are here, if you wish to share your thoughts on such a delicate matter, yes I would listen. Of course, all you UKdating ladies are all pretty much virgins or virgins again so I understand if your view is based on what your naughty friends have told you rather than first hand. Penny for your thoughts..

Just had a call from a beloved family member and reminded of so much sorrow, yet it is so easy to get sucked in and then..it starts..anxiety..fear..disabling..what if this happens, what if that happens and I FREEZE.
To those of you out there in a similar position I say..yes there are sorrows with many (but this has always been the case, perhaps we were just unaware of it), do CARE but DON'T TAKE IT ON, it won't help the person and certainly won't help you. You can best serve your friends, employer, spouse, boy/girlfriend, Lover (lovers if you are that in demand!) by being on form, reaching for your goals, having a smile, having something goin' on! Don't get lost in the haze of unhappiness, it is tempting to stay there, sorrow and pity can be addictive, I trust for greater things for you in 2009. Go out there, do your thing! That's the best contribution you can make to all around you and good for you too! That's what I am going to do, hope you are able to join me fellow friends and UK daters..

Yesterday, I was speaking to an NLP Coach who I am working with on some goals I wish to achieve. He talked about some things which ruin good relationships. The most pertinent points I remembered were;
When you meet someone don't assume they are the one, the soulmate and look for proof this is the case. In doing so you will be blinding yourself to areas where they are not a good match.
Don't get so lost in them that you want to be with them every minute, it will overhelm it, plus you need to maintain other interests and other friends.
Deal with your neediness as unresolved stuff from your past, don't contaminate the new relationship - it may suffocate it.
Rather than interview your new partner on their feelings and various stuff continually, watch what they do as a cue for how they feel about you. Act in moderation and watch the response rather than rush in and smother. Give them a chance to respond.
Well there was more but these 4 points spoke to me. Foolish heart, why do you lead me astray so. So much to learn...I hope you all have success out there in building a good relationship with your partner in 2009..

Wow, just finished my work for year-end at 10.30pm, New Years Eve.
It has been one long day since September, so many things that could drop. So many risks. Thankfully, none of the balls did drop. I have been in this job 7 months, had 3 bosses and the ERP system I learned changed after 4 months, whilst seperating from my partner, and finding a new to live. That's complicated!
It's a good feeling and I am glad to have pulled out all the stops. My only regret is the price it exacted upon me, but hay, life isn't always easy.
There are so many things moving in the right direction i want to focus on that and take a deep breath for what hopes to be a good New Year. A Very Happy and delightful New Year to you all, especially those I have made friends with over the last few months, TG xx